And on that Bombshell ...

Well, there I was at work coming up to 5 pm, there's a new email in my inbox.  Oh great. No it’s just more ApplauseStore X Factor spam surely?  No it isn’t … hold on ….

“Congratulations, you have now successfully been booked into attend the recording of TOP GEAR SUMMER 2013 - BBC taking place on Wednesday 17th July 2013 at 13:30.”

My own tickets at last! I had two lots of generous guest tickets and now this. I was amazed at my luck. Who to invite …. Well you know that by now.  I was very sad that one particular person I had invited couldn’t attend but settled on getting the three musketeers back together.  We had met on Twitter originally and then back in 2012 at Top Gear Live at the NEC in Birmingham.  We kept in touch on Twitter and Facebook ever since. 

So ... to the day …

“I am on the early train”  "OK good I will pick you up at the station, cross over the road, go down the slope and look for Pizza Express. I will be parked nearby."  So Jane was the first to arrive. 

The night before Helen and Alan had stayed on the other side of the river and found a fab pub to go to.  But now they were on the road to my place and arrived at about 9.30 am. Time to relax in the shade for a while before we set off.  Within 30 minutes the sun had moved round and it was already steaming hot.  We moved into the little shade left under the Ash and Cherry trees and chatted excitedly about the day ahead.  Ok, let’s gather ourselves and set off.  It would prove to be one of the hottest spots in the country that day, recording 32.8 C at Hampton Water Works, just over the river from us.  

We did the now familiar drive and arrived at Dunsfold at around 11.30 am.  Always leave plenty of time, just in case. It means a long wait but there are things to do.  We gathered by the entrance to the t-shirt store and had the now traditional picture taken and posted on Twitter. 

Then to the burger van…  yummy as usual.  Now shall I brave the Top Gear loos? Yes I am going to have to … fortunately this time not stinky and plenty of water for hand washing. Thank goodness.  It's really steaming hot now so we get ice creams and head for the shade, completing our quiz while we wait.  We meet up with others and as the time grows closer we move towards the spot where the crowd manager will give us the safety talk.  It’s really hot now.  Everyone is sweltering, many not in the shade.  

At around 1 pm we hear a helicopter arrive.  We are pretty sure it’s this week’s SIARPC as we haven’t heard any squealing tyres so far.  We wait… and wait… and wait… Then at last the crowd manager gathers us all together in the hot sun for the chat.  Then we wait … and wait… it’s well past 2 pm … we wait in the full sun for the last few minutes and are concerned we will all be fainting in the studio.  

Then, at last, the call … down to the studio, check the wristbands, and we are in.  Many people are already gathered around the set so no front row seats this time.  No complaints, many have Help For Heroes t-shirts on and one chap has his foot in a cast.  I happily take up a spot behind him.  Jane joins me. We are right in front of the green chairs, beside the camera station.  Helen and Alan head for the spot just behind Jeremy’s chair.  

More waiting, it's absolutely sweltering now. I do hope we start soon. It reminds me of a holiday in Rhodes we had years back when the temperature got up to 40 C.  At last the doors close, the lights dim and the floor manager addresses us, introduces the Director (who does the same speech and same joke every week), presents the prize to the winner of the quiz, and  he then introduces Jeremy. 

Jeremy bounds onto the stage and greets the audience.  He explains at some length the reason for his attire. Similar to last week … white t-shirt, blue and white (checked this time) shirt, unbuttoned, and jeans.  It’s their way of covering up the inevitable sweaty pits on such a hot day! OK too much information Jeremy.  He jokes with the audience, as usual picking on someone and telling them THEY won’t be at the front.  Then he introduces Richard and James.  They join the stage at the same time, Richard in … yes you guessed it ... dark jeans, white shirt and a grey suit jacket.  Nutter.  And the excuse is the same, he says it covers up sweaty pits, not that they are sweaty yet … so he shows us all … ooops yes they are sweaty and it’s only going to get worse.  Jeremy then point out that James just wears a shirt and jeans, a lovely loose turquoise one (which we understand he bought in India).  So who will win the sweaty pits competition … well James of course, as he lifts his arm to display an unstained shirt.   He has done it properly! (I can confirm when I met him later he was indeed fresh as a daisy, as always). 

So that’s the intros done, time to start filming, cameras away, phones switched off (not even on vibrate … off!).

The chairs are up on the stage this time and the intro is done over on the other side of the studio by Jeremy.  Richard and James had gone back to the green room.  Then we watch Jeremy’s film about the SLK Black … the grey one and the garish yellowy green electric one.  Afterwards they film another segment adjacent to the cars, with the lap board … no giveaways on the timings and anyway I couldn’t see and can’t remember what they were.  I think it was good news for Jeremy though. 

Moving on, it was time for "The News".  And bad news, the programme has to be 2 minutes shorter this week because of some motorbike racing following Top Gear on Sunday night, so guess what, they cut the news down.  They had used this particular News item on each of the previous shows but it had been cut by the Director.  This time Jeremy had a plan … they went through it again, quickly, and did it just as well as before, but a tighter more edited version. They finished crisply with an intro to the next item. No retakes. They will have to use that one. Up yours Director!  Haha! Jeremy seemed smug about that.   Even better, I am sure I saw Helen on the monitor behind Jeremy. Excellent! She looks stunning.  

Then they introduced the comedy item of the week … the Hovervan.  We moved over to the big doors in the hope of getting some fresh air, and be close to the exit when it’s time to break for tea. I was quite surprised at just how funny it was.  Actually why should I be surprised.  It was hilarious, the usual cocking about of course. 

 

Then it was time for the tea break and as they opened the doors, the sunshine flooded in … would James be there serving tea in the hot sun? No sign, lots of people already out there. I worked my way through the crowd in the direction of the usual spot and yes, there ... a glimpse of turquoise shirt.  Oh happy day! I am so glad Helen will get to meet James.  

I think I might have been the first of our group to arrive and take the gift of tea again.  James was already tucking into some sweets from a gold cardboard box that someone had given him … chew chew chew … constantly no sooner had he finished one then he popped another sweetie in his mouth. He seems to like them very much!  

I joined the queue and I waited as others had their photos taken.  Then it was my turn, again! “Hello James … here’s a goody bag as a thank you.”  He offers me tea and I take a cup.  He took the bag of goodies to and looks inside “This is all good” he says (Woman Crisps, BBQ Beef Hoola Hoops, Jelly Babies and American Hard Gums).  This time I have to ask him for a few autographs and feel a little awkward asking for so many (three … one for a friend who has a birthday as a surprise present, one for Snowy as a momento of her visit last week and one for me … greedy I know … a pic from last week as well).  “How come you are here again?” he asks “Have you cheated?” … “No! Guest tickets before and my own tickets today." He accepts that. I had said to him before, I didn’t expect this sort of luck ever again.  So time for the pictures … Jane has my camera and snaps away, his arm around my shoulder and mine around his waist. I encourage Jane to take plenty of photos, then  I make way for others.

It’s Jane’s turn and he signs her autographs, one for Jane herself and two for others. I snap away at pics for Jane then it’s Helen’s turn. 

Alan has been taking pictures throughout but now its time for him to take pics of his lovely wife with Mr May.  James asks which camera to look at and Helen points in Alan’s direction.  “Who is that?” he asks “That’s Alan my lovely husband” she says.  “He’s a very very lucky man” says James. Helen gets her autographs too and eventually moves away for others to get their turn.  One autograph is particularly graphic "Arse - Bugger Off. Love James May x" Perfect.  The pictures are lovely and James has a particularly big smile with Helen on his arm.  Niiiice.  

We look around for any of the other presenters and though there are rumours that Richard is out I don’t see him anywhere.  The crowd thins a little and we return to the tea table to sneak a few more pics of James.  He turns and notices us and sends a quick silly cheesy grin in our direction … and I caught it on camera! One of the best pics of the day. 

We go back into the studio for the SIARPC interview.  No chance of getting to the front for this one, Wolverine Hugh Jackman.  He seems a very personable, professional chap who has worked hard to get to where he is now.  Not my type but everyone I mentioned his name to before the filming was very impressed! We stood at the back near the green room where there was a bit more air.  After a while someone nudged me … there was James behind us, looking for a friend.  We moved over and said hello again. He was happy to chat for a moment. Helen took the opportunity to get her picture resigned as she had spilt tea over the first one. He’s happy to do so and also signs Geena’s lanyard too. She takes a pic of him and he makes a funny face at her.  I don’t take pics or talk to him but am happy to just stand there to observe and smile and enjoy the moment.  

Then we notice Richard is there too.  He had been out, went back in then was out again looking into the crowd and observing the interview on the monitor quietly.  Geena gets her lanyard signed and a photo with him.  He’s very cooperative so I risk it … “Hello Richard, may I have your autograph”.  Yes of course” he smiles and takes the Sharpie and the envelope I had for my photos (2^nd Class pre-printed - I found a little irony there but I think I will let that go … ).  He signs his odd signature (no message) and hands it back. He disappears back into the green room without another word.   

I also noticed a very striking athletic looking blonde outside the green room and after a few moments it clicked who she was.  Phillipa is it? She looks lovely and photos in the papers don’t do her justice.  

We are close to the Hovervan and it must be an opportunity for the next filming segment.  I find myself behind a chap but second row? That’s fine.  Then they move us all back a good 5 feet and somehow I am at the front.  Then of course the Director moves the young attractive ones in front of us, but luckily the very attractive blonde in front of me is is a little shorter than me so I still  have a good view.  There we go, the Hovervan item 1 is filmed, I may be in shot for some of it [yes I was, briefly!].  We watch the film and laugh a lot!

The heat of the day is forgotten. It's getting later and just a touch cooler, a sad reminder that filming will be over soon.

Then another item is filmed … the closing item this time. And another layer of beautiful people are added.  This time I'm not so lucky and peer around others from the third row.  Still I see a bit of it and am happy.  

 I have always said I have no particular interest in seeing myself on the telly (true I promise) but it seems to please some people and I thought what the heck, if it happens then fine and I have a permanent memento of my visit on film.  If not then it doesn’t bother me.  However after last week a work colleague emailed me … “I see your love of fast cars has been confirmed by your presence next to the McLaren”.  It made me smile.   

Finally Jeremy has to do some words to camera for Worldwide audiences … I am standing right behind him so won’t be seen … 6’ 5 verses 5’6 is no contest, until he shuffles a bit and I can see the camera lens. So maybe, just maybe you will see my mug on telly again somewhere in the world.  I am the one with the bright yellow t-shirt and sunglasses on her head looking a bit awkward.  

And on that bombshell, it’s time to end.

@VintageBarbara